rise
by her-eyes-fiery-pinpricks
Summary: Something wrenches at Finn. It is behind a sheer, tearing, black sheet, and it must be from a time when he Was—sometime before this, something before all of this Dark—a night, that happened to be not dark at all. No. There was no Dark then. Several starry times, actually, where the Light is her. Light is this beauty. -t bc-genres aren't that great-will add picture
1. comatose

**i made this different than igy bc i gotta categorize the shots somehow. organization excites me**

**now time for you to get excited, jessie: a series of kingdom keepers oneshots, most famanda, others all, inspired or having to do with skillet songs. i cant tell you how long this will last—i literally currently have two ideas. but this have been a year of experimenting. doing tlotf was one of the biggest steps ive taken even in the direction of becoming edgier with my writing and i guess we can lump oa and cts with that, bc those were my first serious serious famanda romance smoochies, and this igy was a bunch of cool stuff, and aia lol im still laughing, and chessy chess is one of this things im most proud of. SO. this will contain a lot of experimental and unique stuff. expect additions to this shotseries next week and maybe the week after. then? the craziest thing yet. :D**

**sorry about constantly talking about my fics over and over again agahh thing is im still tryna figure this all out for myself**  
**this is inspired by "comatose". (listen to the live version. im never listenin to this song again i just played it on my beats on repeat for two hours writing this i am DONE with this song lol).**  
**this song is extremely intense, not what i would immediately call edgy, but as i looked deeper and deeper into it i found something that i could use. the tile itself revealed the destined plot to me.**  
**this story, i felt as i was forming it, is very mellow for the heaviness of the song, but i added in some things to keep the darkness. (that i hope will keep the darkness.)**

**this takes place after three, before four, when finn and amanda like each other but are not a thing. and somehow, someway, both are in sbs together.**

**the title will be changed soon maybe.**

**rise**  
**song 1: "comatose"**

Finn is slowly, and surely, going darker and darker and darker and darker. All paths and all alleyways and all possible systems down this involuntary road will prod him farther and farther till the Dark stays.

It has a quality, this Dark—or property, or ability, one of those kind of words—to fasten to his sight or soul or being. All that he feels. All that he is. A constant murky, dusky void.

And he hurts, he aches and throbs, he longs for this thing he grasped for, in a time before this. In something before all this dark. He imagines and doesn't see and feels the visions, never watches them. Uses his arms to reach, his feet to move.

Something pulsates a sad, phantom song, in the area below his head but above his stomach. Cannot recall what It may be. But It feels like It is not here.

He is without any sure sign of restoration what might have once been. Sitting, immobile, in this shady place.

A place where she is not here.

No names are used, nothing to categorize one untellable thing from another. But there is a beauty missing from his discerned area. An actuality so exquisite and wonderful and cosmic and bright that it doesn't need a name.

Something wrenches at Finn. It is behind a sheer, tearing, black sheet, and it must be from a time when he Was—sometime before this, something before all of this Dark—a night, that happened to be not dark at all. No. There was no Dark then. Several starry times, actually, where the Light is her. Light is this beauty.

He keeps this scene behind the sheet playing, in what is left of his shrinking mind, because that is all he can clamp onto. A sure thing. A reason to Stay and Be…

All he knows…he must return.

He must return.

He must get back to her. And cast his eyes on the full form of what he's dreaming of…

* * *

Amanda is spiraling, continuously. A cease to this cloudy grayness is unthinkable. It will just all lead to the Dark.

Bruised and beat and…punched…at...this is always and this will never be not happening. And she is powerless to end it, to kill it. So she remains. Able to strike but restraint in this hazy, shadowy void.

And she hurts, she aches and throbs, she longs for this thing she grasped for, in a time before this. In something before all this dark. She used to feel more. There is nothing other than this hating of the battering now, but there was a time when there was further emotional. She evokes a time of Solutions.

A pounding more powerful than the ones on her skin wants out. Cannot recall what it may be. But It feels like It is not there.

There is no sign of delivery from this cloaking distress to a place that might have once been. Now she stands, struggling, in this hazy place.

And place where he is not here.

He is weightlessness and he is the base. He keeps order…he lives so that others have life. There is presence and vitality and passion when his memory is induced.

Something tantalizes in front of Amanda. It is behind the sheer, tearing, black sheet, and it must be from a time when she Was—sometime before this, something before all of this Dark—a night, that happened to be not dark at all. No. There was no Dark then. When he did what he does best—he saves. Light is him. Light is sanctuary.

She keeps this scene behind the sheet playing, in what is left of her shrinking ability to stand, because that is all she can clamp onto. A sure thing. A reason to Stay and Be…

All she knows…she must return.

She must return.

She must get back to him. And receive all she's been needing during this time of nothing…

* * *

This is where they know their feelings for each other are real.

Both are there. Both fell simultaneously. And what could have been so beautiful wasn't—there's Earth and Above and Below and In-Between and Sleep and Memory. This is where lovers are together.

Now, they are in a place where one is alone. Without. Lacking the thing they need.

And both are Young and both haven't Realized the requirement for each other's company. The life each receives from the name of the other. The attraction between and the creation between and the magnet that was submitted into both minds at the time of Formation. The only match in existence that share these names lies motionless somewhere.

It's a sadistic finger that placed both in this Dark—the kind of act that nauseates and arouses and angers. And because each need the event of unity, and closeness and intimacy and attachment, those who are Finn and Amanda may exist to Stay and Be when they are apart.

What is causing the pull inside of both lost beings is somehow trapped in between breakable bars and unhappily so. It hurts the most. This is what they are clawing at.

Then this is when the feelings intensify. They want and yearn so much that the emotion takes over the confusion he's experiencing and the hate she's living and is even more powerful. He can't rise. She collapses to immobility. And something burns bright.

They are both so vulnerable..._lost all things that make them strong_...and yet...because of who they are...they crawl ahead...

He imagines but cannot see. She screams but cannot speak. They not only don't have their life-sources but they don't have the ways in which to arise and go and find their love.

And both imagine…_is this what Forever will be?_

A new feeling blooms, first in their cores, and then sluggishly reaching their extremities. It thumps and grows numb and replaces the former feelings.

But perhaps this hurts the most, because what they are needing is there, _right there,_ but they can't…_return to it…Return…_

* * *

They awake.

Their eyes open at the same time. The first thing they see is each other.

No movement is made, no breathing. No blinking. They are on something soft, facing each other.

Then Amanda reaches out to feel Finn's face: she does. It's the first thing they've both touched for forever.

He is aware of her contact and she is conscious of her sight that he is here. Both sets of eyes are cloudy. Both are locked.

No movement, no breathing, no blinking around them. There may be. But nothing they acknowledge.

The first thing they feel is each other.

They were brought back.

They were returned.

And both see, at the same time, silently telling how similar both times in Dark were, when the pulsating object appears in whole form in front of each. Their…hearts…_their hearts_…their hearts present themselves to the lovers.

He is my heart, she thinks. And she is mine, he thinks.

They just have to see each other to share how terrible it was there. And both empathize.

There is no Dark here.

They just stare.


	2. fire and fury

**Now I'm scared that I'm gonna get tired of this song. I don't think I will, because it is the most Famanady song ever. :P**

**More and more I want to be referring to scenes in the books as my inspiration and background, since I seem to stray a lot, and I want to get closer to the action scenes which you all know aren't my strength for comprehending and writing.**  
**This is an attempt :D These scenes are what I see as some of the most important or memorable in the creation of Famanda. Or at least memorable. THINGS WILL BE A BIT ALTERED—the dialogue and the length of events that did or didn't happen. This will make it fit. Nothing to change the stories of the books.**

**The first part is from ch 25 in 3, the second from ch 10 in 4, the third from ch 11 in 5, and the last part from the last ch of 5.**

**rise**  
**oneshot #2: "fire and fury"**

And for being so large, the snake can move lightning speed. It recoils the slightest to snap forward with its head and bring the boy to his end—

She's not used to things this quick.

_"Finn!" _ Amanda shrieks, not obeying Philby's tight hold of her arm. Her scream causes Finn's head to whip around. For a second—_a shorter second than the snake's second—_his eyes meets hers and Amanda knows if her fear on the inside is showing, her look must be so distressed. Normally she wouldn't show these kinds of things to someone she may feel something more for. Amanda isn't one to show the weak sides.

There is no hiding here. Here, lives are in danger…and so quickly they are jeopardized.

The snake's hissing head tumbles through Finn's legs, causing no disturbance in the boy's stance, but his anxious expression softens to Amanda's gaze.

"We have to _go_!" Philby warns, tugging more on Amanda. She shakes her head with aloud refusals—then sees clearly, how difficult she's being—and allows her feet to move, tripping over herself and brushing Philby's hand off her.

_And Finn just almost died!_

Amanda might cry because she feels her composure slipping away. She keeps her hands on the side of her face and holds her hair back—everything's getting in the way.

"He's fine, he didn't get hurt." Philby says, as they stumble through the jungle. The Keepers must be great friends. This amazes Amanda. The way that they know what each other's thinking. They went through this overload shock too, their first couple of missions. They must have handled it so much better than Amanda. One hundred times calmer. Even now they DHIs sprint on, leaving all of the fear behind.

All of the fright and bad things going away?

There's too many bad things that have happened, that she has seen, that she has experienced, and too many uncertainties. Letting all of it go is impossible for Amanda.

"How do you guys live like this?" she asks. And he's probably thinking how whiney and weak she is, to think of something like this as the biggest happening of the night. It's gotten casual to the DHIs, to wake up knowing they dodged a few bullets.

He doesn't answer. The answer is, she thinks, you don't live. You wait.

But she agreed to get herself into this. She agreed for her sister to get involved with this. Her sister could get hurt—and that does not sit well in Mandy's chest. She's spent almost two years with these people and she's pretty sure she feels something for them, that she wants to protect them, that she wants to be a part of this.

And having a position in this means risking her life. It's a required fee for this mission. This started when she took a look at Finn in seventh grade and thought she'd give him what she could, show what she knew, to smooth out that little riff in the Kingdom.

This will be forever.

Philby and Amanda struggle through greenery, carefully watching their footing, as Philby looks behind to see if he catches a glimpse of the snake slithering under the drooping leaves. The air has gotten stuffy. Amanda doesn't look back. She can't and she won't. Not until she reaches the clearing and they are there safe. _Safe_…she repeats. They're gonna be safe. And they will be.

She saw how Finn put himself in the middle of it. How he told them all to get out of there. She knew what he was thinking—a snake doesn't want one kid. He wants them all. But this is what Finn missed, a fact underneath all of the heroics—when all the rest of the kids disappear, the animal will go for the snack in front of him. And Finn was right there, as the snake looped around the glowing boy, but he'd rather be in the face of danger alone than with his friends in front of him.

_He's so brave_. It's not a question as to what to do when things are risky and he can solve it. He'll step up. He has to, it's in him. Amanda almost finds herself smiling, thinking about how headstrong he is.

But she needs someone like that. Amanda's strength only goes so far. If she pushes too much—literally—she's spent. No more. From Finn…it's never-ending.

And the clearing makes itself visible to the two, and Finn will meet Mandy here in a few moments.

And Finn's going to make it.

As he always does.

* * *

Maybeck climbs in the farthest backseat. Finn, Willa, and Dill take the middle. Charlene sits front. Mrs. Whitman starts the car, looking out the side.

Finn's tried to stay strong. He's tried to keep his head up. Amanda may not ever awake. There's no way to get these prodding out of his head that's demanding it's his fault, _It's my fault..._

He puts his head in his hands and lets out a sigh. "Stupid. Stupid, why did I _ever_—"

"Finn," Willa tries, and as usual she sounds comforting, but it's doing nothing for his nerves.

He can't ever be with Amanda again. Because when people are associated with Finn, misfortune ensues. He can't get close with others because they are in danger when he's in danger.

At that moment in time, a cloudy night in November, he's certain that all he wants, all he cares about, is Amanda. To be with her. To make sure she's okay. Maybe it's her absence that's producing these thoughts, but her safety comes on top of saving the parks and keeping his school life afloat and everything else.

He's being irrational.

"No," he says aloud. "No." She is important.

She is the most important. He cares about her…so so much…

"Dude. What have we encountered that we haven't solved? This is a minor thing. And we know what we're doing, it isn't like we're back to the drawing board—"

"_It's not!_ Not when it comes to her. Not…minor…"

He got a bit loud. Silence, for a few dangerous moments.

"Finn…" Charlene begins. Anything thread of jealously that had ever been was gone now. "You can't beat yourself up to the point of—"

"It was me who did it. It was me! Not the Overtakers or anyone else, it was me, I kissed her. It was me. Me, of all…" Talking nonsense. He isn't making sense.

What he means to say is that it was him, someone she might actually care about too, that did it. Not someone who wanted her dead. A person who's priority is her own safety.

Killed her.

"She's not dead." Dillard says. Hasn't said anything for a while. Sometimes Finn forgets he has—had—a life before this. With normal people. With small problems.

Even now he doesn't know if he has a life. He spends every moment mending someone's mistakes or falls. This time it's one of his own faults and maybe it'll tear him apart before they can do anything to save her.

"No, it looks like it, but she's not." Willa turns and hugs Finn. He receives the embrace gladly, burying his face in her shoulder. He doesn't know when he became so pathetic. "And Finn," she whispers, so only he can hear. "You've needed to be so strong for so long, but I know that this stings."

More than that.

Two years knowing these people and he's certain he loves them. Takes stake in their wellbeing. And times like these when he's grateful for Willa's sisterly kindness and Maybeck's optimism and Charlene's reassurance and Dill being there with them.

"But there's no hope if you shut down. None if we believe this is the end."

He repeats those words in his head till they echo. Until it's painfully resounding, replacing those bludgeoning words that harbored before. He needs to hang onto Willa's words. And she'll wake up…There's hope.

He has to believe something.

In a few hours he'll see Amanda, awake and alive.

And Amanda's going to make it.

As she always does.

* * *

He holds her tighter than ever. The wave looming ahead doesn't have a face, and if it did, Finn wouldn't want to see it. It's probably murderous and terrifying.

But they both keep their eye on it, because disconnecting could bring it all down.

Amanda strains. It's a constant game of realizing his arms around her, and then forgetting because there's this tugging at her chest from the pushing, and then feeling Finn again. That's what keeps it going. That's what keeps the force from dying.

Or what's left of it. Right now she's working off of his persistence.

"We need to move back," Finn whispers. Amanda nods.

"Hold on to me," she says, and her voice is strong, somehow.

"I've got you."

He's aware of the delicateness of the situation. How this needs to be consistent. Constant. And she knows he wouldn't dare let go.

And like Amanda's game, it's a dance. Back. Easing back. Stepping away, struggling not to stumble over each other's feet. She feels his breathing. He feels hers slowing. "We're almost there."

They aren't almost there. The wave creeps ahead with their movement…and once it hits the gate he doesn't know how they'll escape this. The rushing water will break their grip. Even they aren't that strong.

And her arms ache more than they ever have before. She's never pushed this long. And she tries to stay upright but he feels it, there's no way but down. He holds her up. And she dares to step back again and again until it's all numb.

"Finn—no—_more_—"

A figure. Massive and startling. His face peeks through the water as Amanda doesn't bother putting a name to him. She's focusing on staying vertical.

Finn has never felt more thankful. He expects to completely rely on Triton now, and to run, or at least, run and carry Amanda because it doesn't look like she'll be running or walking.

Then he sees they can't. No, the gate isn't close enough.

He imagines a world of untellable colors and tumbling because that's what he'll be feeling if they don't make a get-away. That's how Amanda will die…can't let her die like that, not Amanda...she needs to push it farther…she needs to push it farther…

He spots a clear tube. And knows.

"Can't—" she sounds helpless. The act of talking takes so much.

And right now she's just feeling Finn around her…one source of warmth…something good she feels…something she feels because everything else is numb...all she needs is for him to get closer….

Finn needs to get closer…

They need to get closer.

Finn's lips touch her cheek. "I know you can."

That's what they needed.

The power increases. And the wave rises.

* * *

He's running, as he always is, and she's there at the right time, as she always is.

The connection is short but it remains long in both of their minds. She wants to cry out but maybe it's better she doesn't. Because he continues to fly.

Jess and Mattie don't speak. They seem frozen by the speed too. Amanda finds his expression and he's been running for a long time. But there's victory in his step. His hand…the adrenaline sharpens her vision. He grasps something firmly.

He has the flash drive.

But she's not relieved for a second. The gray, wild animals driving him and Willa forward are snapping for the kill and there's only one way of escaping…

Finn keeps the image of Amanda's face at the forefront, in the place where he keeps his motivations and reason and fuel. She's the reason. She's why. He has to keep her safe and his friends safe and that's why he runs.

All of the times they shared. Every time she laughed and smiled and he thought she was beautiful and was scared of that thought. Didn't understand what it meant.

Even now he isn't exactly sure.

But she's there and he's thankful she was…she's always there…

He's always there, she thinks…

And maybe in a few moments they won't be.

But somehow—because it's always been that way—both know they will. They've overcame the impossible before.

What's the raging water of the sea going to do to the indestructible pair?

And yet they cringe at the thought.

They will make it.

**I hope all of you have a blessed Passover/Easter/Springtime!**

**twd season 1 ep 3**


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